If your phone gets wet, try putting it in a bag of dry rice. At night, the rice will attract Asians who will fix your electronics for you.
I dont think thats how it works
hello hello introducing my new cosplay of tumblr user pizza
i tried doing a mini photoshoot for a photoset BUT MY DAD WALKED IN ON ME WHEN I GOT A PICTURE AND
THE SIGH HE GAVE WHEN HE CAME IN
I HAVE FAILED YOU FATHER
If I were a magic wizard I wouldn’t harm people when they pissed me off, I’d just put these really fucked up random curses on them, like every time they saw a school bus they would shit their pants, or every time someone said the word Thursday they would pretend they were a dragon for 20 seconds.
i think you would be a very good wizard.
my nephew was singing thrift shop and instead of saying cock he says clock
walk up in the club like waddup i gotta big clock
i think you meant… whaddup i got a big ben :D
no that is not what i meant at all
not least because that is the great clock of westminster
yeah its called big ben
my mom always texts me rude things so ive just started replying with an emoji of an eggplant and it gets her so pissed it’s great
sO my friend’s dog died and she lives in new york city and so she had to take it to the vet by the subway and she put the dead dog in the suitcase on the subway and it was a pretty big dog and some dude saw that she was struggling with the suitcase so he asked if she needed help with it and he said do you mind me asking what’s in it and she didnt want to say a dead dog so shE SAID IT WAS A BUNCH OF LAPTOPS SO HE TOOK THE SUITCASE AND RAN AND I JUST